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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28498272">Make Sense of the Madness</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlesWrites/pseuds/AlesWrites'>AlesWrites</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Falsettos - Lapine/Finn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marvin is a Mess (Falsettos), Panic Attacks, Safeword Use (non-sexual), Whizzer Brown is Trying</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 04:29:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,408</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28498272</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlesWrites/pseuds/AlesWrites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The word caught Whizzer off guard. He whipped his head around to see Marvin staring at the floor with his hands covering his own knees. His grip was tight and he could tell because his knuckles had gone white. The sight made Whizzer’s heart speed up. He knew exactly what was happening.<br/>~~~<br/>Marvin has a panic attack and Whizzer is there to help him through it with kind words and hugs.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dr. Charlotte/Cordelia (Mentioned), Whizzer Brown/Marvin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Make Sense of the Madness</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Please enjoy this cluster of head-cannon after head-cannon following my boys and the bumps along to road they face. &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The evening sky was filled with freckles of stars. The moon peeked out from the clouds and shone bright through the window of the family home. Marvin and Whizzer, along with the lesbians from next door, had all traveled to the Weisenbachfeld home. Every other week the group would all come together for a family dinner; the entire thing was Jason’s <em> wonderful </em> idea. Everytime they come together, time flies past them, filled with laughs and good food and warmth. That was Whizzer’s favorite part of the evenings. Like now, he feels warmth creeping in his chest from the sight of Marvin and Jason curled up to each other on the couch asleep.</p><p>After a rather loud snort from Cordelia, Jason’s eyes fluttered open. Whizzer watched in amusement when the kid tried to move and discovered his predicament. The boy froze, knowing that if he woke his father it wouldn’t end well. Marvin had always been a man who got really grumpy if someone woke him up. Miraculously the only exception to this was Whizzer, he could pour ice cold water on Marvin’s head (something he had to do a few times) and he still wouldn’t be as mad as he would be if it was someone else. It was yet another reason why they were perfect for each other. Of course, there were rare instances where others would wake him and he was fine. For example, a few weeks prior Jason had awakened from a nasty nightmare and woke Marvin up on accident. The older man grumbled in annoyance at first, but almost immediately switched into what Whizzer dubbed “dad-mode” when he saw Jason trembling in fear. The only reason Whizzer knew this happened was because he was a light sleeper, and woke up due to their bedroom door’s nasty creak. </p><p>Jason sat silently with his father’s weight crushing him, giving Whizzer a pleading look. He snickered and shot the boy a mischievous smirk. If it had been anyone else, he would have let them suffer and laugh all the way through it, but this was Jason. Jason and Marvin were his weak points. And boy, did Jason know that. After another puppy eyed stare, Whizzer gave in and moved to sit next to his lover. He gently tapped Marvin’s shoulder and watched as the man groaned. A quick peck on his cheek and a hand on his thigh, and Marvin practically lit up. He shot awake from the unexpected contact. </p><p>Whizzer knew that Marvin was quite the touchy person, as much as he denies it. Luckily, so was Whizzer. Often the older one would hide, saying it was Whizzer who liked the contact. This was a lie of course, and everyone could see right through it. No one brought it up though, they all respected that Marvin had come so far already. They all knew that his toxic masculinity was something that hadn’t been tackled all the way yet, and that was fine. On occasion however, Whizzer would use this little secret to his advantage. When Marvin isn’t expecting the contact, he tends to jump and fluster. Everytime, it is a very enjoyable show. </p><p>Marvin realised what the younger had done and glared at him with no fire in the gesture. Whizzer smirked leaning in and waiting for Marvin to close the distance. Thankfully the other obliged and wasn’t turbed by the trick too much. The kiss wasn’t anything special, just a lazy, smiley kiss. One that lingered and was just about feeling the other. Whizzer hummed and scooted closer to Marvin, wrapping his arms around his lover's neck and nuzzles in closer. </p><p>“Ugh, stop. You two are so weird.” Jason complained next to them. Whizzer pulled away, leaving Marvin to let out a small whine at the loss. The taller man laughed and ruffled Jason’s hair, he knew that the kid meant no harm by it, knowing for a fact he has asked him multiple times for help with girls. It still puzzles Whizzer why Jason goes to him for romantic advice about girls, being that he is gay and with the kid’s father. He doesn’t mind though, he enjoys every moment he gets to spend with him. </p><p>“Don’t call me weird when we both know you’re the weird one! You’re at a party and you’re listening to music instead of talking to your family.” His smirk only grew when Jason opened his mouth to protest, but nothing came out. Instead, the kid moved to put his walkerman away.</p><p>Whizzer curled up closer to Marvin snaking his arms around one of his lover’s and resting his head on his shoulder. He sighs contently, “This is nice.” It was quiet, only meant for Marvin to hear. The older man hummed in response and placed a hand on his knee, running a thumb idly on it. It was nice, it was everything Whizzer wanted in a relationship. The two years they were apart really changed them both. Marvin was kind now and was working on his faults. Of course, there will be moments he messes up, but both of them have become better at noticing those moments and stepping away from each other. After they are apart for a little while they will sit down and discuss what to do to make sure it doesn’t happen again. They agreed that it was the best way to deal with the situations and grow from them. That was another thing Whizzer loved about their second go round: the patience. It was real and not fabricated like it was before. Marvin really loved him, and wasn’t just confused on what love was. They worked together as a team. </p><p>When they first got together it was pretty shaky as they still needed to establish boundaries. It was <em> new </em> having a partner who cared about how he felt for once, someone who listened to his boundaries and respected them. He loved it, all of it. </p>
<hr/><p>It was around eleven when the evening went wrong. Whizzer had moved next to Cordelia, who was currently seated in her girlfriend’s lap. They were talking about some new fashion trend and how odd it was. Then, Mendel had suggested that they all play some games. Of course Jason was excited by this, he was beginning to get bored and sleepy, but a game of chess always got him to pep up. The kid was practically a collector of the boards. The last time Jason told him the number, it was at twenty-three sets. </p><p>“Games sound great!” Jason sprung up and started bolting to his room. </p><p>“Get more than just chess, dear!” Trina yelled just as Jason left the room. </p><p>Whizzer was excited to play some chess, too. He hadn’t had the chance to play Jason or Marvin in ages. He knew he was bad, but he had been practicing for two years. During the time he didn’t have Jason in his life, he would play chess when he felt he missed the kid. </p><p>Jason returned a few minutes later holding four boxes of chess sets, and a box with the game <em> Sorry! </em>Whizzer was never a fan of the game, so he was already mentally opting out of that session. It was then that he noticed the second box in his arms. It was just like any other chess set, but to Whizzer and Marvin it meant something. That board was the same one they fought over before Marvin kicked him out. The set itself wasn't anything special. The only thing that made it distinctive was the scribbles on the box, including Jason’s name and several doodles in permanent marker. Whizzer cringed looking at it, he really didn’t want to see that board ever again. He figured though, he could live with seeing it for one night despite the bad memories it brought up, he just wouldn’t use it to play. Instead he opted for the one he always found interesting. It was a chess set that Jason had gotten from Charlotte when her and Cordelia had gone on a cruise. They stopped in some tropical island with a marketplace and bought the set. Apparently the woman who sold it to them said it was made of fish bones. While Trina found the board odd, Jason and Whizzer loved it. He picked up the box after Jason set them on the table, and began to unpack it.</p><p>“Doughnut.” </p><p>The word caught Whizzer off guard. Marvin had been quiet for a while, and now that he thought about it, he probably should have checked on him after seeing the chess set. What really made him go off kilter though at the sudden word was because it was their <em> safeword </em>. They had never actually used it before because they knew each other's limits in bed pretty well. Whizzer chose it after the odd compliment Marvin had given him at the baseball game. Whizzer thought it was funny, and swore he would never let Marvin live down the weirdness of complimenting him before even saying hello. </p><p>Whizzer whipped his head around to see Marvin staring at the floor with his hands covering his own knees. His grip was tight and he could tell because his knuckles had gone white. The sight made Whizzer’s heart speed up. He knew exactly what was happening. When he and Marvin had just gotten back together, they had a discussion about what had happened during the two years away. One thing Marvin said he had started having, was panic attacks. His attacks tended to be rather violent, once he said he collapsed and blacked out only coming back to reality an hour later from a car horn outside. The first time Whizzer witnessed one scared him immensely. He wasn’t sure how to help his lover. After that scare though Marvin told him that he just needed for him to stay by his side and touch him. Hugging was usually the go to method. </p><p>The safeword usage, while unexpected, was effective in getting Whizzer’s attention and pleading for his help. Thankfully no one seemed to notice Marvin, or the fact he just said ‘doughnut’ with no context. Whizzer excused himself from Jason, offering Mendel to play in his stead. The psychiatrist was more than happy to take his place. He swiftly moved to sit next to his lover. Whizzer knew that he couldn’t comfort Marvin here, being in front of Jason wasn’t an option. He offered his hand to Marvin, who in turn looked up at him with fearful eyes. He looked like he was on the brink of tears.</p><p>“We’ll get out of here, let me tell the others. Okay, baby?” Whizzer leaned in and whispered. Marvin nodded hesitantly, shutting his eyes tight. He gave his hand one final squeeze before letting go, and moving to talk with everyone else, “Hey guys, Marv is getting tired and it is already pretty late. We are gonna head out. It was nice seeing you all!” </p><p>Charlotte peeked past Whizzer, who seemed to get more and more nervous as the interaction went on. Then, she saw Marvin. He was shaking like a leaf and she grew worried. </p><p>“Are you sure?” Charlotte didn’t want Marvin leaving if he felt sick, she was a doctor after all and could help him.</p><p>Whizzer nodded a bit too enthusiastically for her taste, but she knew he wouldn’t give in if it had to do with Marvin. Cordelia seemed to pick up on her girlfriend’s worried energy, and began showing signs of concern as well. She wasn’t just worried about whatever Charlotte was freaking out about though, she was also worried about Whizzer. Marvin and him were usually the <em> last </em> people to leave the house, never the first. Whizzer looked nervous <em> and </em> wanted to leave early, that just wasn’t him. </p><p>“Whizzer, are you okay?” Cordelia laced the sweetest voice she could manage, Whizzer seemed to calm a little from it, but nonetheless still insisted on leaving, “Okay then, see you later?” </p><p>“Yeah,” He turned to face Trina, who wasn’t paying much attention to him in favor of looking concerned at Marvin. “Trina, we’ll be back tomorrow to get Jason, yeah?” </p><p>Trina snapped back from looking at Marvin, “Y- Yes of course… is he-” </p><p>“Marvin is fine, he just needs some sleep.” Whizzer really wanted the conversation to be over, he wasn’t sure how long Marvin would last without crying or making noise. </p><p>“O- Okay then, we’ll see you tomorrow.” Trina gave him a little wave, and Whizzer was grateful she seemed to not push any further. </p><p>He offered his hand again and like before, Marvin had a vice grip on his lover. It hurt a little, but at that moment Whizzer was too concerned with getting him home and safe to care. Just as the two reached the foyer, Jason and Mendel came running up to them. Whizzer sent Marvin outside, hoping that he could get this interaction to end sooner than later. </p><p>“Whizzer! Where are you guys going?” Jason gave a little pout that tugged at the taller man’s heart strings. He didn’t want to leave, neither did Marvin, but it was important that Marvin felt comfortable, and that just wasn’t here. </p><p>“We have to head out right now, sorry kiddo. We will be back tomorrow to get you early though!” He tried his best to fake his own signature smile, most likely failing miserably. Jason, bless his heart, didn’t notice and shrugged it off, leaving Mendel behind. </p><p>“Why so early?” Mendel quirked his brow.</p><p>Whizzer wasn’t sure if Mendel knew about Marvin’ attacks, but he really didn’t want to lie, and make the conversation go on any longer. “He’s having an attack.” Whizzer hoped that Mendel knew what he meant, and if he didn’t it was vague enough to play off of. Judging by the reaction the psychiatrist had, he did.</p><p>“I see. I won’t hold you here then, good luck. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.” Mendel offered a sympathetic smile and Whizzer did the same.</p><p>He gave a quick, “Thanks, Doc!” and slipped out the door. When he got outside, Marvin had already started crying. “Oh, honey…” Whizzer cupped the man’s cheek, and used the pad of his thumb to try and wipe away some of his tears. “Let’s get you home.” </p>
<hr/><p>Whizzer was about half way home when Marvin’s cries died down, he knew it was only a moment before the next wave would start. For now, all he could do was keep saying encouraging things in an attempt to calm him a little. “Hey honey, can you say something for me?”</p><p>Marvin shook his head harshly. Whizzer could tell the man immediately regretted his decision, based on the way he grunted and grabbed his head. “Yeah hun, you’re gonna have a killer headache tomorrow, but we can just spend the day in bed, okay? You don’t have work so we can take a lazy day, that sound nice?” When he got no response Whizzer assumed another fit of tears was coming. However, a few more moments went by and it was still silent, aside from Marvin’s panting. The taller man took the opportunity to place a hand on the other’s thigh, and squeeze to let him know he is there. That he wasn’t about to leave him alone during his lowest point. However, instead of the response of loosening muscles, Marvin seemed to tense up. Whizzer found that weird, but he wouldn’t push that now. He had more important matters to deal with at the moment. </p><p>For a minute, Whizzer sat in silence and just thought about something he could say to comfort him. It was clear by the tenseness of Marvin’s muscles, that what he had done so far wasn’t working. He thought about maybe trying to take his mind off of it with sex talk, but quickly shot it down. He would feel like he is taking advantage of Marvin if he did that, and he didn’t want to do that. Not in a million years would he want to do that. He thought about cracking jokes, but again he shot it down. When the other man is this emotional, he rarely processes humor. Whizzer shivers when he remembers the first time he tried to calm Marvin with humor. Marvin didn’t get the joke and thought Whizzer was making fun of him and went deeper into a fit of tears. Maybe he could make a grand gesture to distract him. He did have a small box in the back seat. It sits in a shopping bag he has refused to take in. Marvin had questioned the mysterious bag, but Whizzer just said it had something he planned on returning. It did in fact have something he planned on returning, but he couldn’t get rid of it at the moment because it was hiding the ring. But alas, Whizzer said no to that thought. He wanted to make that moment romantic, not panicked. Finally he settled on an idea that wasn’t too shabby in his mind. He remembers Jason telling them a story about his therapy session with Mendel a while back. The psychiatrist surprisingly didn’t give the kid bad advice, that is if you rephrase it slightly. </p><p>He cleared his throat, “Hey, remember what Mendel had said to Jason? You’re gonna be alright. Remember he said that if you feel alright for ten minutes, you can feel alright for twenty-”</p><p>“Then fourty.” Marvin choked out, voice hoarse. </p><p>“That’s right, baby. But, let’s aim for that first ten.” Whizzer smiled to himself, he was elated to hear his lover’s voice. Something that stayed consistent with the man’s attacks was that when he started to talk it was coming to an end. Once silence fell between them again, Whizzer was again pondering what he should do to calm his other half. After a short while he gave up effort on coming up with something himself, and opted for asking his lover himself, “Do you want me to do anything for you, to help you?” </p><p>Marvin was silent for a bit longer till he finally choked out, “S- Sing for me?” The phrase was hard for him to get out, as right after another tide came rushing in and the man was reduced to loud sobs. </p><p>Whizzer didn’t <em> hate </em> singing, but he really didn’t do it for other people. It was more a personal hobby. Marvin was the same way, he enjoyed singing to himself. There was one key difference though, Whizzer could be caught singing, while Marvin had heightened senses when doing it. He could tell when someone was coming and would shut up promptly. Whizzer tried so many times to catch him, but always failed. Still to this day he has never truly heard Marvin’s voice, no matter how much he begs to. Whizzer, on the other hand, is likely to be caught, and everytime Marvin would compliment him sweetly. He would always get embarrassed for being discovered. Although the man was confident in many fields, his voice, to be stated kindly, was one thing he didn’t think was above average. </p><p>“Okay…” He had never purposefully sung to someone in years, it felt weird to even think about. He felt nerves bubble in his stomach, he knew Marvin liked his voice (why else would he ask to hear him sing?), but he was still self conscious. What song to sing was also an issue, he didn’t want to pick something too peppy. He also didn’t want to sing a ballad to his already sad lover. He thought that maybe a show tune would be a good idea, but then again musicals tend to be very cheery. Then it hit him, he could sing a song from <em> Sing to Me Instead </em> . It was an album released by a Broadway star and the songs were sweet. Sweet was just what he needed. ‘ <em> Which song from the album would be best fit for this situation though? </em> ’ Whizzer wondered. <em> In Case You Don’t Live Forever </em> was nice, but not quite what he wanted. <em> Grow As We Go </em> just seemed to be their relationship in a single song, but that song could be filed away as too sad. Then the song <em> Ease My Mind </em> popped into his mind. It just felt right, not too sweet, but not too sad either. In fact, it felt like the perfect song to encompass their situation at the moment. </p><p>Whizzer began to sing the song, he prayed that his choice was good. He wanted to help Marvin to get through his attack. Thankfully after he finished, his lover was silent and he could feel him staring intensely. Whizzer decided to focus on the road and not the man staring him down. He knew that if he did he would make a self-deprecating joke about his voice and then his efforts to sing would go to waste completely. Marvin would end up crying about it and he would just feel guilty. Then again, Whizzer is an idiot, he steals a glance at the man staring holes into his face. But, when he sees the look on Marvin’s face, any joke about his voice died before it had a chance. He looked confused and scared. A sort of grim glaze coated over his usual bright blue eyes, his jaw set rigidly. He has seen that look before, though it has been a long time, he remembers it vividly. The last time he saw it was when Marvin had kicked him out. It shot despair through his veins like poison. Acidic in a way that made sure he felt every cell in his being, being decayed. It was one that made sure he knew he had done something wrong and that it had to be his fault. </p><p>Whizzer didn’t want to have that discussion in a car when they were almost home. He didn’t want to know what Marvin was thinking, because whatever it was, it wasn’t good. Millions of ideas of what he had done wrong that night raced through his mind. Was it because he was taking too long to get home? Marvin knew that the trip back would be a while, didn’t he? He has driven them home before. Maybe he thought Whizzer would hurry it up for him. The pet names? He’s never objected to them before. Maybe he changed his mind about them. Did he hear him tell Mendel and get mad? Whizzer hadn’t known how else to get them out quick, so it just came out. He didn’t mean to hurt him. Was it his advice? Well, Mendel’s advice rephrased, but still. Maybe he rephrased it badly. His song choice? Maybe Marvin had expected something different. It seemed that each question came to a yes, he did that wrong. It didn’t even matter if he <em> knew </em> the answer was no, he found a way to twist it around. He felt himself almost lose control before mentally berating himself. He just wanted to help and he was trying to, to the best of his abilities. He worried though that he just wasn’t doing enough, that he couldn’t do enough. That idea made the poison in his veins halt for a moment, before shooting two times as fast and painful through him. He struggled to keep the growing lump in his throat calm. </p><p>He made one final turn, then parked in front of their apartment building. He paused staring out at nothing, letting his mind come up with millions of horrible scenarios. Whizzer didn’t want to face this. He thought that since they got back together, things were going fine. He thought that they were doing better, both of them. For Christ's sake, he had a ring in the back of his car waiting to be worn! He thought that Marvin had changed, he didn’t want to even think about the idea that he may have been wrong. That it was only a matter of time before he snapped and went back to the self-centered father he was in his past. The two stayed silent the entire way up to their apartment with Whizzer struggling to find the right thing to say and Marvin doing <em> whatever </em> he was doing.</p><p>Once they got into the apartment, Whizzer swiftly shut the door and hugged Marvin. He knew that Marvin may very well hate him. Still, he tightened his embrace wanting some form of comfort. It may have been selfish, but in that moment he didn’t care if Marvin did hate him. He just wanted to hug the man he loved. He let his head fall into the crook of Marvin’s neck, and he stayed like that for a while before he heard a choked sob next to his ear. Whizzer pulled back and examined the man he was holding. Marvin was a mess, his hair was rustled from how he was holding his head in the car, his nose was running and he had tear tracks covering his face. His expression wasn’t a pretty one, it would be honestly disgusting to anyone else, but Whizzer always thought he looked stunning. The way he’s crying and sniffling honestly reminds him of Jason; the kid tended to openly sob, just like Marvin is now. </p><p>Whizzer held his lover’s face, but despite his gentleness, Marvin flinched. He immediately pulled away and waited for him to calm down. They stood in tense silence, and Marvin just stared at him with that look. Whizzer squirmed under the glare, and his insides churned uncomfortably. He wanted to reach out again and comfort Marvin, but he didn’t want to see him flinch from his touch. He didn’t want to see that look worsen. </p><p>The pressure grew to be unbearable, Whizzer felt like he could barely breathe. The slightest mis-step, and he worried that the world around him would collapse. </p><p>To his surprise Marvin was the first to move. The man was silent and simply turned his back to Whizzer and spat, “Leave.” </p><p>Whizzer was of course taken aback by it. At first the pit in his stomach grew ten times larger, but then noticed the other’s state. Marvin was shaking, and his voice was, too. He knew Marvin, and Marvn didn’t want him to really leave. </p><p>“No.” He said a bit too sternly than he meant to sound. </p><p>“Whizzer. Leave. Now.” He bit back with more fire. It stung to hear him say that. It was almost a replica of the words he used years prior. </p><p>“Marv-” Marvin sharply turned and his face was unreadable. </p><p>“Whizzer, please just… go next door. I- I’ll be fine.” Whizzer didn’t believe a word the other had said. He knew that if he left his side, he would most likely go into another frenzy, and he was not about to be the reason for it. </p><p>“Tell me why.” </p><p>Marvin wasn’t expecting the question, if his expression was anything to go by. “What?”</p><p>“Tell me why. I want to know why I’m leaving, or else I won’t. If it's a valid reason, I’ll go.” Being so straight forward was not his specialty, but desperate times called for desperate measures, right? </p><p>Marvin shifted uncomfortably. “Because-” He started. He tried this several times, just starting with, “Because…” And trailing off. Whizzer worried he took a step too far, until, “I’m scared, Whizzer.” </p><p>Whizzer took a mental sigh of relief as the feeling of, <em> Oh, he doesn’t hate me, </em>washed over him. “Of?” He prompted.</p><p>“You…” <em> Shit </em>, was all he could think. “And me.” Well he hadn’t expected that. “It’s- Whizz- Listen, I- It’s not you.”</p><p>“If you say, ‘it’s me’ and dump me, I will not leave.” Marvin bitterly chuckled at this.</p><p>“No, I… God, I don’t know what I would do without you. I just- Whizzer... “ He worried about what would come next, he knew it was irrational because Marvin had just said he wouldn’t want to leave him, but he couldn’t help the dread that crawled along his skin. “You scare me Whizzer. You make me feel like I can fly, and then five minutes later-” Marvin chokes on a sob that seemingly got caught in his throat, and it tugs at Whizzer’s heart to see. He felt useless just standing there and not running a soothing hand through his lover’s hair, or holding his waist, or hugging him close. He just had to wait for Marvin to finish, “God Whizzer, I’m scared of myself around you. You deserve the world, and you’re stuck here with me. I’ll just end up hurting you again, like I did before…” He trailed before continuing, “I saw that damn board and this happened! I saw it and… Whizz, I realised- Have I really changed? I could just go back into my old ways, and that would hurt everyone. I- I love you and I- Whizzer… I-” Marvin lost all his steam and broke into wails of sorrow, his knees gave out on him and Whizzer dove to catch him. The two of them sunk to the floor and held tightly on to each other. </p><p>“Oh, love.” Another rack of cries came forward, “Shh, it’s okay. I’m here, I’m not going anywhere.” It felt liberating being able to finally hold Marvin. He pet his hair and kissed his temple and ran his hand up and down his spine, he pulled out every trick he had to calm him. “Hey,” Whizzer tried to pull back, but when he did Marvin tightened his already vice grip and pulled him back in. “Marvin?” No response. “Darling?” Still nothing, “Light of my life? Honey, can I see you, please?” He felt the man’s head shake violently against his chest. “Aw, come on, not even if I promise cuddles?” He waited a moment before the arms around him loosened some, he found it rather endearing.</p><p>When he pulled away only slightly, making sure that he kept his arms around Marvin, his heart broke. His lover was even more of a mess than before. His eyes had become puffy and red, and the circles under his eyes became impossibly more prominent. Those blue eyes, the ones that usually shine with admiration, so full of love when looking at Whizzer were dull and filled with fear and sadness. Whizzer’s heart was beating so fast in his chest he thought it would implode on itself, each beat panging painfully. Marvin’s figure trembled and visibly shrunk under the gaze of concern he gave him. </p><p>“I’m sorry.” It was all Marvin managed to choke out. His voice was raspy and worn now. </p><p>“You have nothing be sorry for, sweetheart.” He paused, thinking about what he was going to say. He needed to craft this carefully or else he might ruin how far he has come to calm his other half. “Hey, you wanna know how I know you won’t ever hurt me?” That got Marvin’s attention immediately, good move. “Because of this right here, you’re scared to do it. You’re cautious and know when things start to get out of hand. You’re even better at it than me. You’re afraid of hurting me or the others so you take extra precautions to be certain you don’t. And that is because you love us.” Whizzer kissed the tip of Marvin’s nose, earning a small whimper from the other man. “And we love you.” </p><p>It was silent for a few moments more, then the arms around him fell from his waist. Whizzer is confused, before he notices Marvin is trying to get up. “Whizz, my knees feel like jello. Help me up?” </p><p>They migrated to their bedroom and, like promised, cuddled. Marvin was wrapped tightly in Whizzer’s arms. The shorter man had stripped and changed into one of Whizzer’s oversized sweaters. He remembers when he first got the article, Marvin had complained, and said it didn’t make any sense to buy something that doesn’t fit. He smirked, thinking about little quips he can throw at his lover for making fun of something he willingly chose to wear in the morning, when he is feeling better. He himself simply hopped into bed with nothing but his boxers and his watch. </p><p>Once they were situated, the two just laid there in each other’s embrace. Whizzer noticed Marvin fall asleep at around 2 A.M. Soon after Whizzer’s watch began to buzz lightly. When he brought it up to examine, its screen had the message, <em> ‘Timer up!’ </em> on it. </p><p>“Ten minutes. Done. Let’s go for twenty, baby.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading all the way through! I put in a bunch of head-cannons I have for of all these characters. Please feel free to drop a comment or kudo on this if you liked it! The validation helps drive me forward! :3</p><p>Please come over and hang out with me on socials-<br/>Instagram: AlesCreates<br/>Tumblr (Non-art blog): Ales-Chills<br/>Tumblr (Art blog): Ales-Creates<br/>Twitter: AlesCreates</p></blockquote></div></div>
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